Qualities Of A Successful D/s Relationship PDF Print E-mail
The Qualities Necessary For A Successful D/s Relationship From A Submissive Point Of View The definition of Submission in a D/s setting is allowing control to be transferred to another, giving them the authority to make decisions over you. The person to whom this control is transferred is defined as the Dominant and the one allowing the transfer is called a submissive. Once that initial exchange is negotiated the submissive is no longer empowering the Dominant but rather obeys them based on the terms of the agreement. From that point forward the submissive has only two choices, either to obey or not to obey. For a relationship to get to that point, several qualities must be present and without these it will surely be a rocky road and destined to failure. First, there must be trust between both parties , The submissive must have confidence in the ability of the Dominant’s character, abilities, and strength to act in their best interest and not to harm them. Conversely, the Dominant must have confidence in the submissive to reciprocate those traits and communicate openly and honestly with them. Included in this is sharing all pertinent information openly concerning, health, phobias, past traumatic experiences, etc. An example would be if a submissive is claustrophobic, the Dominant should be made aware as they certainly would not want to lock the submissive in a closet or cage and trigger a bad experience. Second, their must be honesty, both parties need to be very clear on their expectations and requirements of the part they play in the relationship. It is after all a partnership, with both parties being equal although acting in different roles……without a Dominant there can be no submissive and vice versa. This must not only be present at the initiation of the relationship but must be ongoing as the relationship progresses. W/we all live very busy and complicated lives and circumstances change and needs change and the abilities to perform often change due to health issues, family obligations, work place situations, just to name a few. All these elements must be addressed and dealt with immediately as they arise. Third, all tasks and interactions must be performed with a willing heart, everything is not expected to be performed to perfection, but must be undertaken without pause and your best efforts exhibited to stay on task despite adversity. This way of being has such an affect on the relationship. When it exists it allows the submissive to grow and allows the Dominant latitude to accelerate that growth. Fourth, the submissive must be obedient, complying too the authority and will of their Dominant. They may not always agree with the approach, or the way they are instructed to complete a task, but must do it to the best of their ability as instructed not necessarily because it is the correct or generally accepted way, but because it is the will of their Dominant. Fifth, the submissive must be patient and flexible, willing to change plans at a moments notice without hesitation or ill feelings. As mentioned earlier, W/we all live busy lives and circumstances arise and plans have to be altered. When they do, one needs to go with the flow and adapt and overcome those feelings of disappointment or frustration and redirect their path to fit the current situation. Sixth, a submissive must be humble and leave the ego behind. They must be willing to perform tasks without expecting praise, but rather seeking satisfaction from knowing they have done their best or from a mere smile on their Dominant’s face. Seventh, a submissive must be honorable. They must always be considerate of all those around them and treat everyone with respect…. and at times, just agree to disagree. Remember, a submissive’s behavior and attitudes are a direct reflection on their Dominant. Eight, a submissive must care for themselves. It is very difficult to care for your Dominant when you are not well yourself. This encompasses all areas of your life, try to keep the drama to a minimum, get plenty of rest, do not over indulge in anything, be aware of changes in your physical being, have regular physicals, You are a valuable asset to your Dominant and just as you treasure them and their assets, you must care for yourself as you are very important in their life. There are lots more that could be added but if anyone entering a D/s relationship will practice the above, I firmly believe they will be on the right track to a successful, rewarding relationship. Lastly, and my personal favorite, if in doubt, always ask yourself,…… is this action about to be undertaken going to compliment or complicate the life of my Dominant? respectfully submitted, razi

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